I was recently asked to write a relationship column for a fantastic online magazine here in India called Women’s Web. My first topic is about dating in India, something I have written about before here and here. These posts have been topics of great controversy, but they are based purely on my own experience and I stand by what I have said in them.
In my column in Women’s Web I have written about the concept of dating in India, which seems to be relatively new here. When I say dating, I mean the real western concept of dating where two people hang out and get to know each other without expectations of engagement, marriage and children just around the corner. It seems to me that this isn’t something that happens much here, and it is actually really hard to do without one person expecting that the relationship will inevitably lead to marriage.
From my very western perspective, I feel like marriage is a lot of pressure to put on a new relationship. I just want to know if a guy enjoys good food and makes me laugh, without worrying about whether he expects me to cook for him and how many children he wants. It feels like there is little choice for those who don’t wish to make a commitment very soon after meeting someone, and therefore options are limited for those who don’t want to either.
The other alternative is to date someone who is already in a relationship and not looking for (another) commitment. Each to their own, but as I think I made clear in this post, that is definitely not an option for me.
Is marriage really the end goal for all dating in India? Is it possible to just date without any pressure or expectation from either party, family or friends that the relationship will lead to marriage or otherwise it must end? What do you think of the advice in this article?
What do you think?